For some reason, the photo of the letter I wrote to Ralph Macchio in the ‘80s has been a popular click for people image searching “Ralph Macchio” over the last two days.  I have no idea why, but I thought it was a good enough reason to bring back the original blog post I wrote about it.  Please, enjoy.

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OMG.  I’m in the process of organizing our house and I found this in a container of things from my childhood:

It’s an unsent letter to Ralph Macchio - still in the envelope addressed to ABC-TV.  I’m guessing I wrote this when I was around 14. 

God, I am so glad I didn’t send that or for sure I would have ended up on some secret list of stalkers to watch out for.

Let’s see…

I open the letter by barking out orders.  A nice introduction, don’t you think?  If that didn’t give him the warm fuzzies, I’m sure the thinly-veiled threat that followed would have made him jump for a pen and paper!  I WON’T BE IGNORED!

Next, a description of a piecemeal centerfold in Tiger Beat serves as a metaphor for the aforementioned thinly-veiled threat. 

Finally, I must have realized that Ralph Macchio wouldn’t be writing me back any time soon, so I close the letter with my signature attitude at that time of what may be best described as “arrogant indifference” with just a smattering of “fear of rejection.” No wonder no one ever asked me on a date. 

And yet, look how the little fangirl in me holds on to one iota of hope with that p.s. at the end.  Sigh.

Not one of my finer moments, folks.  But entertaining, so what the hell!