I so totally love Canada. Why? Because they brought the wondrousness that is Holmes on Homes into our lives.

Don't know who Mike Holmes is?

There you go.

Mike Holmes is our new hero. Basically he repairs problems for families who have been fleeced by shifty contractors. With permits.

Holmes on Homes has a very distinct style. Tony has deconstructed the show into five acts:

1. Dismay - As Mike goes through the home, he creates a verbal laundry list of all the shoddy workmanship he finds. 10 minutes of disbelief.

2. Bitching - Mike begins ripping out walls and ceilings, finding more hidden troubles, like faulty wires, improper insulation, and coffee cups. 10 minutes of sledgehammer use.

3. Pleasantry - Proper repairs begin (with proper permits). 10 minutes of firm handshakes with reputable subcontractors.

4. Permits - Mike reminds the audience that permits are of the utmost importance when selecting a contractor to work on your home. 10 minutes of "Permits, permits, permits."

5. Celebration - Mike walks the homeowners through the incredible changes he has made to their home by correcting the problems that have ruined their lives and their bankbooks. 10 minutes of tears.

If you have been missing out on this guy, tune in to Discovery Home weeknights at 6pm and a whole bunch of times on the weekends (you know how cable is...). It's the best hour of television we've discovered since Heroes.

Mike Holmes rules!