July 27, 2006

A conversation between two bloggers

From: CK
To: Danielle
Date: Jul 21, 2006 12:39 PM
Subject: Re:

I always thought it would be cool to have a chicken restaurant and name it "Sam & Ella's," but I wonder if that would hurt business.

I once wanted to start a theme restaurant called "Mullets Incorporated," where the entire staff had to have a mullet of one form or another.

Then there was the fudge shop I wanted to call the "Around the Corner Fudge Shop," in tribute to the "Milk, Milk, Lemonade" childhood rhyme. This is why I can never start my own business. I'd doom it with a bad name.

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From: Danielle
To: CK
Date: Jul 21, 2006 12:41 PM
Subject: Re:

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! I only walk around the house screaming the "Milk, Milk, Lemonade" song ALL THE TIME! Also, do you know the Diarrhea (Cha Cha Cha) song?

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From: CK
To: Danielle
Date: Jul 21, 2006 12:56 PM
Subject: Re:

Diarrhea Cha Cha Cha? Only that Beavis and Butthead would sing it around Daria. I do, however, know the "If you're sliding into first and you feel something burst, diarrhea pfft pfft, diarrhea pfft pfft," song (See: Parenthood w/ Steve Martin, Rick Moranis, Keanu Reeves, Martha Plimpton, etc.), as well as vaguely remembering the "you get up in the morning put your feet on the floor and make a fifty-yard dash for the bathroom door" song, which may be another part of the same one. But I haven't sung any songs about diarrhea in many years.

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From: Danielle
To: CK
Date: Jul 21, 2006 12:59 PM
Subject: Re:

Yes, the Parenthood version, and I think that other part is definitely part of the same song. Now, growing up, we sang "ungh unghs" where the "pfft pffts" are, but then later they changed to cha cha chas.

Diarrhea cha cha cha
Diarrhea cha cha cha
Some people think it's funny but it's really brown and runny.

Diarrhea cha cha cha
Diarrhea cha cha cha
You can tell by the smell that you're not feeling well!

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From: CK
To: Danielle
Date: Jul 21, 2006 1:29 PM
Subject: Re:

Oh, yeah, that's the one.

So you had grunts instead of fart sounds? That would seem to imply that the diarrhea required an effort to expel from one's body, which seems contrary to the intent of the song. (Overanalysis like this is a sign that you may be too old for the song anymore.)

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From: Danielle
To: CK
Date: Jul 21, 2006 4:40 PM
Subject: Re:

Right, exactly, I never thought of that. Unless it's the kind of diarrhea that creeps up when you're pooping, so there, in theory, COULD be grunting. Although, more commonly, the diarrhea would be of the explosive variety, in which case the song is really off the mark.

Milk, milk (point to boobs)
Lemonade (point to crotch)
Round the corner (point to ass)
Fudge is made! (simulating pooping, optional)

I love the bean one! And because we went to a good Catholic school, we also sang:

Strangers in the night
exchanging rubbers
this one is too tight
I need another
This one is too long
to hold my schlong
This one is too loose
To catch the juice
This one is too wide
to fit inside

There was more but I don't remember.

And of course there was the Walking Down Canal Street poem that we learned from Jeff. It's really filthy so I'll email it to you so I don't get too many disgusting google searches.

Hahaha! I love "Sam & Ella's"! What is the milk, milk, lemonade song?

Last week, as we were walking home from dinner, I sang the diarrhea song (w/pftt pftt's 'cause that's how I was raised!) to my daughter who was completely mortified. I've been hooked on it ever since.

Also, remember this little rhyme?

Beans, beans, good for the heart;
The more you eat, the more you fart.
The more you fart, the better you feel,
So, eat beans at every meal!

Yeah, teenagers love it when you say that one, too!