Thursday afternoon, I gathered my students in a circle on the rug for songs and movement. I looked at the child next to me and saw a hint of green in his ear. I reached over and pulled out a small ball of playdough. It's not unusual to find foreign objects in the facial orifices of my students, so I just removed the playdough, no questions asked.

Yesterday I discovered why he had a small ball of green playdough in his ear. While the other students were rolling and smushing and cutting playdough,(which, by the way, is encouraged because working with playdough improves and strengthens a child's fine motor skills and better prepares them to hold a pencil. Plus it smells good and it's all squishy.) Playdough In The Ears Boy was taking huge chunks of playdough and jamming them in his ears. I had to intervene. I'm sure the minute I was out of his sight, he was shoving green playdough back into his aural canal.

Two years ago, I had a student who liked to eat foamy puzzle pieces. He especially preferred blue or yellow alphabet pieces. Right before I'd stick my finger in his mouth to retrieve the object, he'd swallow it.

When I taught second grade, one of my students arrived at school one morning looking somewhat different. I said, "Trevor. You look different... Where are your eyebrows?" Trevor replied, "I shaved them off." I inquired, "Why?" Trevor's response: "I just wanted to see what I would look like without eyebrows." Fair enough. Not long after, his white-blond hair was pink. He used food coloring to dye it.

For most of my life, I've made decisions based on whether or not I would please others. I've done things just to belong, to get attention, to be the perfect daughter. Some of my choices serendipitously turned out to be right for me. Others, not so much. The main point is, I hadn't made choices for myself. I tailored my actions and decisions around the effect they would have on everyone else but me.

I'm learning to make choices for myself without running to other people for validation and approval. It's the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, but I'm doing it because it's necessary.

I'm shoving playdough in my ears, eating puzzle pieces and shaving off my eyebrows just to see what I'd look like without them.